Containers
Consider the element of water. Aptly symbolizing emotion, water flows and pours and seeps into soft ground. Without solid edges to hold it, water will spill everywhere: both overwhelming and lost at the same time.
Emotion, memory, and spirit can be like this too. Have you had moments when you’ve felt something swelling up, but part of you evades it and part of you tries but can’t grasp it? Be present to the watery parts of ourselves is necessary for us to have flow, ease, and clarity. However, even those most comfortable with emotion can struggle to hold heavy or murky ones as they arise.
We need containers: spaces with solid edges that allow us to experience a feeling before it spills away and without it crashing over us or soaking everything. There are many forms of this:
a religious or spiritual gathering with rituals for expression and presence
a timer to set aside room to journal or feel that we know will have a clear end
beloved friends or family who are glad to hold the heaviness with us when we ask
guided meditations or imaginative practices
walks or sits outside around plants when our bodies can move, minds can wander, and grief can be held by plant neighbors
trusted therapists and/or other healers who offer dedicated time to open and close our wounds and who have the wisdom to walk us through our experiences
and car ride spent listening to emotive music, crying, and/or primal screaming
sessions of asana yoga, breath work, or other body-spirit techniques that give tangible ways to access our inner worlds
material spiritual practices such as tarot, altar rituals, labyrinth walks, and candle-lighting
arts and crafts that let us encounter feelings while engaging tactile media
a place such as a chapel, open sanctuary, beloved park, or at-home altar / prayer book
so much more!
A good container has a material element, whether that is a tool, place, or body (your or others’) and is time-bound. Even one of those features is enormously helpful.
What this does is 1) help us to access feelings and 2) provide safe parameters for experiencing them so that they do not overwhelm us but instead can be moved through. Remember, emotions are not just abstract — they are called feelings because they have physical sensations! That makes them sometimes confusing to get at or understand and gives them potential to be too much for our bodies to carry at one time. However, it also means that we have concrete entry points for encountering them and tangible means of navigating them.
There are an incredible amount of tools at our disposal. We just need to try them, find our favorites, and practice them.
What containers do you have in your life?
